Is there anything so charming as baby nakedness? A chubby, little, dimpled bum residing on little, chubby legs or from the front, a little pot bellied tummy on chubby legs are precious. Add big eyes and a little, self satisfied grin and grandmommas melt in mass.
The nakedness idea began on the way home from lunch. Nat’s mother--Oh, did I mention that she came with Nat?--said, “I need to hose her off.” The dogs would have been pleased as punch had we just set her on the ground, but we wanted to spare Nat the 90 pound Catahoula’s beach towel sized tongue. The word “hose” had switched on the light bulb above my head. “This needs to be done outside with the hose--naked,” popped into my head. Her mother agreed. They live in the city and occasions for outside nakedness are rare. Besides, Nat doesn’t mind bucking societal rules, and this was the perfect time and place.
Properly peeled, Nat took the hose. A big grin lit up Her Cuteness’s face as she looked up at her mother and succinctly summed up the situation, “Naked”. Our faces were alight, also. (Though the descriptive “child-like” would be more accurate here since my face leans more toward the descriptive “old“. The only shared characteristic being “fat”.) Here was innocence and delightful fun rolled into one chubby bundle. Docked on the patio, (read converted driveway) we all got down to business. Natty sprayed herself, flung water on us, and drove all of the dogs into hiding.
Have you ever noticed that when water is involved in a child’s play, the grownups feel compelled to provide toys in as great a multitude as possible? If sto-bought toys aren’t available, improvised ones are just dandy. So, there sat Nat, in an under-the-bed storage box with the top ripped off and a crack in the bottom, playing with a Styrofoam cup, a red, plastic cup, and a bright yellow watering can with a white plaster flower glued to its side. Her mother threw in a plastic Dora and Piglet figure. Strange mixture, but we’ll not call attention to the difference of genre’ between Piglet and Dora.
Piglet swam. Dora floated on her back in a puddle along with the dirt, grass and acorn bits who had come to play. Nat poured water from cup to cup, cup to watering can, and vice versa. Then, Dora was playfully dunked into the watering can several times. Piglet escaped water abuse. Nat’s droopy eyelids and swaying body signaled an end to the fun. She was scooped up, diapered, and put down for her nap.
If you love a child, raise your hand. Mommas love their babies no matter that they are approaching 40 and getting the first of many gray hairs to follow. Grandbabies are different. As the nurse placed my daughter’s new born in her arms, she looked at her and said, “You just moved into second place.” That about sums it up.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Saturday, July 24, 2010
My Parents Marked Me For Life
We were talking the other day and realized that we are old. How this happened is not clear since we are old and our memory has taken a quick zip down the other side of the mountain. We think we are at least a couple of ions old because when we tell a story about what we do remember, one of our off spring or an off spring’s off spring will comment, “Was that in the dinosaur age, Nana?” or some other sage observation.
After the realization that we are indeed old, the conversation progressed to things our parents said that have gone by the wayside in this age of (questionable) progress. Some of our friends may remember these, but, then, they are old, too, so, who knows? Our young friends, the ones who are less than an ion old, haven’t got a clue because they were born after computers despite disbelieving there was ever was such a time.
THE SAYINGS
#1: “If you don’t straighten up, you‘re gonna get a whippin‘!” Yes, our parents actually made this threat and actually carried through, though not with an actual whip. Usually. Equally amazing, had we called Child Services, they would have snorted into the phone and said something like, “If you’d straighten up and fly right, you wouldn’t have to worry!”. There was no chance of escaping their cruelty.
#2 “”Because I said so.” It’s amazing that we actually thought this was a valid reason for us to a) not to get to do something or b) to have to do something. Either way, your plans changed instantly. Parents were at one time not required to explain their reasons. Evidently, when they brought us home from the hospital they received a certificate excusing them from having to explain their actions to their children.
Saying 3: “You come here this instant!” Children used to be much faster. Probably from being forced to play outside even in the hot summer. I’ve observed that, in this age, when parents say this to a child, the child gets “here” a good deal slower. Modern parents understand this, though, and allow their children 5 or 6 extra minutes to arrive.
Saying 4: “Eat all the food on your plate or no dessert!” Now, I want to say right now that this is the reason I’m fat! My mother, on many occasions advised me of this. Her desserts put anyone else’s dessert to shame and by Georgie, I was going to have that sugary, fat-laden goodie she’d whipped up even if I were to burst. Well worth the pain since this would have left room for a second helping of dessert .
Saying 5: “Get in the back seat {of the car} and go to sleep.” I’m lucky to be alive. A sudden stop and I would have gone flying around the car like a crazed bumble bee. On the other hand, cars were made of real metal, so it might not have been too bad. Since my favorite place to nap in the family car was on the ledge beneath the back window, that big, rotund land yacht may not have helped much. .
In addition to these little ditties, my mother was guilty of mental cruelty. Our washing machine was in the kitchen and on the faucet handles resided a 6 foot long switch. It was in full view every time I came into the kitchen. Because of this flagant flaunting, I became a perfect child.
The things my parents said to me, the way they treated me, including discipline, left mark that is still there to this day. If you want to see it, it’s on my heart. Both of their names are written there. All the letters i are dotted with a heart. I think the mark will last forever.
We were talking the other day and realized that we are old. How this happened is not clear since we are old and our memory has taken a quick zip down the other side of the mountain. We think we are at least a couple of ions old because when we tell a story about what we do remember, one of our off spring or an off spring’s off spring will comment, “Was that in the dinosaur age, Nana?” or some other sage observation.
After the realization that we are indeed old, the conversation progressed to things our parents said that have gone by the wayside in this age of (questionable) progress. Some of our friends may remember these, but, then, they are old, too, so, who knows? Our young friends, the ones who are less than an ion old, haven’t got a clue because they were born after computers despite disbelieving there was ever was such a time.
THE SAYINGS
#1: “If you don’t straighten up, you‘re gonna get a whippin‘!” Yes, our parents actually made this threat and actually carried through, though not with an actual whip. Usually. Equally amazing, had we called Child Services, they would have snorted into the phone and said something like, “If you’d straighten up and fly right, you wouldn’t have to worry!”. There was no chance of escaping their cruelty.
#2 “”Because I said so.” It’s amazing that we actually thought this was a valid reason for us to a) not to get to do something or b) to have to do something. Either way, your plans changed instantly. Parents were at one time not required to explain their reasons. Evidently, when they brought us home from the hospital they received a certificate excusing them from having to explain their actions to their children.
Saying 3: “You come here this instant!” Children used to be much faster. Probably from being forced to play outside even in the hot summer. I’ve observed that, in this age, when parents say this to a child, the child gets “here” a good deal slower. Modern parents understand this, though, and allow their children 5 or 6 extra minutes to arrive.
Saying 4: “Eat all the food on your plate or no dessert!” Now, I want to say right now that this is the reason I’m fat! My mother, on many occasions advised me of this. Her desserts put anyone else’s dessert to shame and by Georgie, I was going to have that sugary, fat-laden goodie she’d whipped up even if I were to burst. Well worth the pain since this would have left room for a second helping of dessert .
Saying 5: “Get in the back seat {of the car} and go to sleep.” I’m lucky to be alive. A sudden stop and I would have gone flying around the car like a crazed bumble bee. On the other hand, cars were made of real metal, so it might not have been too bad. Since my favorite place to nap in the family car was on the ledge beneath the back window, that big, rotund land yacht may not have helped much. .
In addition to these little ditties, my mother was guilty of mental cruelty. Our washing machine was in the kitchen and on the faucet handles resided a 6 foot long switch. It was in full view every time I came into the kitchen. Because of this flagant flaunting, I became a perfect child.
The things my parents said to me, the way they treated me, including discipline, left mark that is still there to this day. If you want to see it, it’s on my heart. Both of their names are written there. All the letters i are dotted with a heart. I think the mark will last forever.
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